We all know the feeling when you’re getting ready for a first date. As the date gets closer, you start to imagine all the things that could go wrong. What if I get cat-fished? What if they take one look at me and walk out? What if they never show up? Most of the time, these fears never turn out to be true, however, in some cases they are much worse!
These brave souls have shared stories of their most embarrassing, cringe-worthy and straight up horrendous dates, all for our enjoyment!
The time I dated my driver
“I met a guy on tinder and we had been talking for ages. He asked me on a date and I gladly accepted. He described himself as a ‘high-end business owner’, so I was quite excited. I got an Uber to my date, arranged to meet him at the bar, and who was waiting for me? My Uber driver!” - Sally
The time I needed permission
“I had a pretty high match % with a woman on an online dating platform, so I clicked the profile. I get to the bottom of the profile where there is what can only be described as a disclaimer. It read something to the effect of: 'FYI this account is operated by my father. I do not have the password and he will be the one checking it. You will have to meet him one-on-one at least once before you get to meet me, with him present. Do not message me if you've ever had sex outside of marriage, if you've ever looked at pornography, or if you're divorced for any reason other than your wife abandoned you'. She was 27.” - assistantmanagerman
The time I dated a baby momma
“Showed up to the date and the girl was pregnant, VERY pregnant. Like holy crap how did you get here on your own, should I be worried about your water breaking any minute pregnant.” - dascthulhu
The time I dated a witch
"Shortly after arriving at the restaurant, my date swiftly informs me that she was a witch and that she had made many men fall in love with her. She kindly informed me that the spell involves taking a sample of her wee, and pouring it into her targets wine without them noticing.” - Jason
The time I tried to break the ice
“To break the awkward first date small talk, I decided it would be fun to share fun facts about each other. They started off pretty harmless, but escalated quickly with her stating, ‘I’m a gymnast and I’m not wearing any underwear.’ To which I panicked and swiftly replied, ‘I’m a virgin.” - Tom
The time I dated a vegetarian
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I was on a first date with this girl who was a rigorous vegetarian. I ordered a beef lasagne; my date ordered a veggie lasagne. The waiter accidentally swapped the dishes around. My date was furious and kept shouting ‘I HAVE COW IN ME!” - Max
The time I dated a very familiar face
“I had been single for about three years. My friend finally decided to help a brother out and set me up with someone. I arrived at the date, and who was waiting to meet me? My cousin!” - Jack
The time I broke my nose
“I was on a first date with a guy and it was going awfully. When the date came to an end, he tried to kiss me. I dodged the kiss and in doing so, tripped on the curb, hit an oncoming cyclist and broke my nose” - Emily
The time I dated Fernando
“I met up with this guy from Tinder and the first thing he said was, ‘My dad is called Fernando, my grandfather is called Fernando, my cousin is called Fernando, my nephew is called Fernando and if you don’t mind, our child will be called Fernando.” - Sophie
The time I forgot her name
“I was on a first date with a girl I met at university. I forgot her name almost immediately. However, I had the genius idea of taking her to Starbucks – I hope she didn’t sus out my tactical plan.” - Bob
The time my date called me fat
“I was on a date with a guy I had fancied for ages. During the main course he said, 'if you lost some weight, you'd be really attractive.' I did what any girl would do and ordered two desserts, made him pay and never saw him again!”
- Ellie
The time I was a tester
“I was on a date with an old school friend. The date went really well and we kissed at the end, only for him to say,
‘yep I’m definitely gay’. He then walked off and I never heard from him again.”- Ellie
Can it get any worse than that? If you think you can beat these dating disasters, comment below! We'd love to read your experiences.
Photo Credit: Jean Philippe Delberghe
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